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Craigslist Says This Large Room Is Available For $1000/Month!

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This is either the most brilliant satire to hit Craigslist in recent past or proof that "nonessential" government employees are starting to get antsy with this mandated time off. It might well be both, but let's go with why it's a brilliant satire. It's clearly written in the casual style of many of the twenty-somethings who utilize Craigslist and starts with "So my roommates all left because of a job thing and I need to make rent."

It gets better. The poster goes on to describe the place, "Yeah, it's big, I know. But don't let the size alone fool you! It's cozy too--lots of individual rooms!" They follow up with the selling points of the neighborhood, "The Botanical Gardens (they're temporarily closed, but don't let that stop you); the metro, and plenty of bars. The bars are important, because what else are we gonna do?"
They also make their political affiliation fairly obvious since they require that any future occupants, "Must be LGBT friendly. Must not be a Republican. Don't be racist. Don't hate women. Must think poor Americans are people." Since Craigslist is bound to take this down imminently, we've got the full text of the ad below so that its humor can remain on the record indefinitely.

"So my roommates all left because of a job thing and I need to make rent. I really think this place is great and I've been living here for a while (incumbency FTW!). I don't want to leave but the utilities are a real bitch to afford on your own. Some facts about the digs:

It's about 775,000 square feet. Yeah, it's big, I know. But don't let the size alone fool you! It's cozy too--lots of individual rooms!

Location, location, location. It's close to everything you could possibly want. The Botanical Gardens (they're temporarily closed, but don't let that stop you); the metro, and plenty of bars. The bars are important, because what else are we gonna do?

It's historic too! It was built in like 1800 something. Don't ask me the specifics, there's a plaque somewhere. Let's just say it's pretty sweet. There are plenty of cool things inside, like a giant statue of King Kamehameha I. It makes for weird midnight runs to the bathroom, but whatever.

Wanna know more just ask!

About you: Must be LGBT friendly. Must not be a Republican. Don't be racist. Don't hate women. Must think poor Americans are people.

Oh, and don't be an Eagles fan, because, gross."

UPDATE 5:44 p.m.: The post has been taken down, but we have the full text above and have added screen shots to our gallery.
· $1000 / 8br - 775000ft² - LARGE HOUSE! LOTS OF ROOM! RECENTLY OPEN! [Craigslist]