Feeling lonely and sexually-frustrated? Is your only companion a rabbit with a long battery life? Think dudes are skeezy because they pimp out their spaces to only hot, sexually-available chicks? Also, do you want to live close to the Red Line? Per-fect. We've found you a roommate in Silver Spring. This seeker is looking for a loveless female "who doesn't entertain overnight guests of a romantic nature, boyfriends or otherwise" because this place is strictly a "booty-free zone". And bonus: It's close to the Wheaton Metro. Plus, your future roommate has an "adorable bunny friend" she refers to as Winter. No guesses as to whether that bunny vibrates or not.