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Creatively Crowd-Sourcing For A Stockpile of Essentials

Well...somebody has put a price on storm supplies and the price is ten minutes of oral sex. Why, yes, a man has offered such a service on Craigslist in exchange for some very specific requests (seems he's a little OCD about the type of toilet paper he wants). Ladies, if you have a high threshold for slimeballs read exactly what he will do for you after the jump, but be warned you can't stay at his place because he, "will ask you to leave, whatever the weather". There's no escape clause so ask ahead of time if you get to keep some of the stuff if his methods turn out to be sub-standard.

From the Craiglist ad:
Simple deal today, ladies. I will service you orally (10 minutes maximum) if you arrive at my front door with: A) one gallon of two-percent organic milk; B) one four-roll package of unscented, quilted, double-roll toilet tissue; and C) eight Duracell D size batteries. Since I am doing you a favor with this service, I will not be able to share any of the aforementioned products. If the worst of the hurricane hits while you are here, please be aware that, after our 10 minutes, I will ask you to leave, whatever the weather. Oh, and for the record, I will not be showing any of my man body during this interlude. · Casual Encounters: Milk, toilet paper, and batteries - m4w - 53 (Kensington) [Craigslist via WashingtonCityPaper]